Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
