But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
we're making bets on your personal life
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
