fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
