If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
