to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Did you pee in the oven last night??
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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