oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
