do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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