I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We had to coat check the pizza.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
