Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
