Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
