And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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