it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I forgot wine drunk hurts
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
