i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
