i jhust puked up my retainher.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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