I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
