That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
