Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i came on her dog
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
