just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
We're too hungover to prance.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
