2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
