There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just cut my nipple shaving
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
