my mouth tastes like poor choices
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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