I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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