is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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