Got a toothbrush?
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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