3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
