I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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