my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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