ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
