I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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