And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
