I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize