I am puke
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
