I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
