I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
