hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
