Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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