We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
