Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
