it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
