Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
