a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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