I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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