Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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