would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
