I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Two words: nipple clamps
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