I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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