You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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