I am in a vortex of obligation.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
