I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
