Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Did I show you my penis last night?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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